It's amazing,

Heartbeat

2008-03-26T22:24:00.003-04:00

I almost lost you. But, I could hear you now. A slow and steady pulse.

*lup-dup.lup-dup.lup-dup*...

and it keeps beating...

I'm back, and alive.

Death

2008-02-11T23:39:00.000-05:00

Watching the video on Bob’s death for the second time in less than 4 months brought you back into my mind. His death reminded me of yours. The minute he let out his last breath, I could no longer hold those thick fat bubbles from streaming down my cheeks. I miss you ever more. I could imagine you lying on your bed, your brain slowly shuts down, the nerve cells disconnecting from one another, and all that was left was your body, an empty core, lying still, waiting to let its last breath out. Was it painful? Did you experience the pain that Bob did? I would never know. The fact is you are gone, now and forever. It is time like this I wish that you were here. Then, at least, I would know what to do. You are always so wise, and strong. You surely would know, won’t you?

It is all too late now. You are gone, and you will never be back. But, you will always remain in my heart. Your strong character, your love for your family, your determination, the warmth of your hands, your smell, your big reading glasses…. You never fail to give me a peck on my cheeks before leaving your house, and so often, I would simply reply with a single “bye”, not even “I love you”. I cannot forgive myself for not saying “I love you” more often. Are you still able to hear them now? I wonder.

Most importantly, your departure reminds me of how limited our time is on earth. The person dearest to us would eventually leave us someday. Death can be our advisor, reminding us how important it is to treasure each moment in life, to love while the other party can still receive it, to forgive, and forget, and just be in the present.

“If we can’t accept the fact that we will die someday, we will never learn to live.” – Tuesdays with Morrie

You and Me and What's Out There

2008-02-04T13:52:00.000-05:00

You are a stranger in this land, bound for excitements.
What lies ahead, no one knows.
Beyond this realm, is another world.
A world, where you might find yourself more comfortable in, or not.

I tried to fit into your world.
Perhaps the excitement, or is it the instability, I am beginning to feel worn out.
This, this requires too much energy, that I am incapable to provide.

Finally, those words came blurting out my mouth during those 5 minutes.

Maybe someday, you will get to where I am, and I might still be there.
Or maybe, by the time you get there, I might have board the next train, setting off for my next adventure.
Now, it is your time, your time to step out of this realm, and experience the world as it is. And it will only be unjust, if I try holding you back.
I had my chances two years ago, and I took it. So, it is your turn now.

Stop hesitating. It is a mere act of cowardice.

It is time for us to step out from both of our comfort zones, and experience what is out there. We might get hurt throughout the process, but we will surely learn, learn to become stronger and more independent.

Gain a little, lose a little, and life goes on.

2008-01-16T09:52:00.000-05:00

You gain, you lose, and the wheel of life keeps spinning.

I did not notice the changes in me, until I was reminded on how care free I used to be, how easy going I used to be, and how I patient I used to be. Perhaps that was what you saw in me.

I lost myself in the process of loving you. Perhaps, I cared too much, and I am sure you did not care less. Now, we have lost it, partially. Don't know when will we gain it back again, perhaps, never, but, life goes on, no?

You asked me what I want? I want to be myself again. The person in me that you might or might not love again.

Perhaps today, tomorrow, next week, next month, or never, we never know. At the mean time, life goes on.

Guard My Heart

2008-01-11T04:06:00.000-05:00

If all these are mere punishment for my behavior, I wish it would stop.
Stop going back and forth. I do not know how much longer I can stand this misery.
I am begging you, please.

=)

2007-12-18T13:28:00.000-05:00

Winter used to be unbearable till you came along.
The wind freezes my heart, my feet, my hands, my face, my ears, my everything, and your presence warm them, your hugs melt them, bringing them back to life again.

Finals week used to be unbearable till you came along.
Door to door 711 hotdog service at 5a.m in the morning, watching you cutting those pie charts and pasting them on to the poster board with your clumsy little fingers made me laugh. Knowing that I am not alone, my shoulder felt immensely lighter.

Most of all, my favorite part of the day is to fall asleep in your arms, and knowing that I will wake up the next morning, in your arms.

p/s: your store credit has been increased from $300 to $900. =))

Honesty

2007-12-08T02:50:00.000-05:00

Sometimes, we tell lies to protect the people we love.
On other occasions, we do so to protect ourselves from being hurt.
Often, these “other occasions” appear more frequently than the “sometimes”.
I am ashamed. I fear. I simply could not.

I admire people who are honest. I appreciate honesty.

Towards the end of psychology class on Friday, Dr. Foster said something that I will always remember. Not just the words, also the emotions that were evoked.

“ I love my wife so much that I married her knowing that she will die….when she does, I will be heartbroken. I was ready to risk the chances of having a heartbreak, because I love her.”

Silence filled the room.

That statement was not necessary to justify the lecture. Yet, he did so, with such sincerity and honesty. It was truly beautiful.

The Thin Red Line

2007-11-23T03:58:00.000-05:00

The thin red line is all that lies between Philia and Eros.
Philia refers to friendship love;
Eros refers to love between lovers.
A line so thin that sometimes you do not even realize that you have cross it.
Once you do, you put everything at risk.
You either gain a lover or you lose a friend.
Correct me if I am wrong.

To love or not? Tough call.
I thought I have made up my mind, yet every time you come close, I lost the courage and determination. The anger vanished. Instead, I just melt in your arms.

I wish the line was thicker and in the shade of bright red, with a danger sign stood right at the border, so visible, that I would not dare to cross it for I know the danger that lies ahead.

Right now, we are standing on the thin red line.
It is not thick enough to hold us both for long.
It will break.
When that happens, where will we fall?

I wish we were standing on solid ground, on either side.

Hope

2007-11-14T02:10:00.000-05:00

**When the sunshine of God's love meets the shower of our sorrow, the rainbow of promise appears. ** - the daily bread november 12, 2007.

After being in the dark for more than a year,
I gave it all to You.
You carefully wrap it with your light,
and sealed it with a rainbow.
May you guard my heart, and lead me on.

The Right Thing

2007-11-02T15:09:00.000-04:00

Your heart tells you that it is the right thing to do, the kind thing, and you decided to stick with it.

You take into considerations all consequences, damages, that you might bring upon the other party and yourself.

The moment finally arrives when the final decision needs to be made.

Once it is done, all there is left to do is to hope for the best.

I pray that we will be strong, because we know, this is the right thing to do, at least for now.

ME time

2007-11-01T19:41:00.000-04:00

Every time I look at you, I lost what I have to say.
I could not think rationally, hence the irrational side of me surfaced.
It hurts to look into your eyes,
It hurts to hear your voice,
It hurts to even be in the same room with you.
I know you mean no harm, and I know you care.
The fact is, we know this is not going to get anywhere.
We are very similar, yet different in many ways.
Right now, we are at different stages in our lives.
Going back and forth will eventually ruin the beautiful friendship we had,
which I cherish deeply.
Maybe, one day, we will meet eye to eye.
For now, all I need is ME time.
So, please understand.

P.S I love you.

Delete Forever

2007-10-30T15:49:00.000-04:00

Today, I decided to tidy up my over flooding gmail account. I never bother deleting anything, even though they are not necessarily important, simply because the storage space allows me to do so. After clearing up my inbox, I went to the trash, second round of cleaning. Then, I realized, the “delete forever” box.

Delete forever. To my surprise, I was startled when I saw that. It was just a bunch of junk, yet, I actually felt sad when I click on that box. Over the span of a few minutes, all the items were deleted, FOREVER.

Sometimes, I wish we had that option, which says, “delete forever” in our system. Would it not been easier if we can just erase unpleasant thoughts, painful memories, broken promises, by just one click? Click. And it would be gone forever. Nothing will ever evoke, or trigger such memories, anymore.
Then again, we learn from our mistakes, as well as other people’s mistakes, hopefully. The past is what shaped us today, and a guideline to our future, as we carry on with our lives. Delete forever seems a little too harsh for me. I could not imagine deleting someone or something out of my life, completely.
All we need is a little time, and space, to mend the broken hearts, and to restore the relationship. Eventually, things will come around, and everything will be all right.

p/s: To my emails that have been deleted forever, may you rest in peace.

Don't know what else to say

2007-10-28T01:22:00.000-04:00

Is this not what we wanted? I guess the hormones are clearing up, and we are finally seeing the big picture. I really don't know what else to say.

Awaken

2007-09-28T00:59:00.000-04:00

Don't remember when we stop caring for each other, we just did.
We stop spending time together.
We stop paying attention to one another.
We stop making up excuses for the late replies.
We stop all that we had before.
We stop, because it doesn’t matter anymore, to you and me.

It was painful at first. I cried, I complained, and put the blame on you. You replied with ignorance. I cried even more.

Standing against the glass door of the train, I looked into my reflection.
I must have realized how fragile I looked, how vulnerable I appeared to be.
A sense of guilt was creeping up my back.

Silence filled the train. It was there and then, it all stopped.

Can't stop them from falling

2007-09-21T22:43:00.000-04:00

Drop after drop, they kept falling. I had some how lost control over them.

My heart aches, literally. I felt the pain physically. This time, it is different.

Are we just going to sit here, do nothing, when the murderer gets away for all that he had done?
when the parents are mourning over the lost of their eight year old? when society do not care anymore? Are we then going to go with the flow, because that is the norm, or are we going to take a stand, and fight? I wonder.

Then, I wonder, what can I do? Drop after drop, they fall again, and again.

9a.m on Thursday

2007-09-20T09:14:00.000-04:00

I kept reminding myself that every 9a.m class is an opportunity. An opportunity that many do not have. Therefore, I should attend every single 9a.m class, Tuesday to Friday, without fail. So far, I have been doing all right, attending classes, as well as paying attention in most of the classes, occasionally, wandering off somewhere else in my little mind. However, this 9.am class on Thursday, erggghh..I just cannot get myself motivated enough to go to class. I already skipped class on the first week, and today, as I was getting ready to go for the class, the christian science church bell rang, stopping after 9 times, I found myself unable to decide whether or not to go for class. I can go online, drop this class (last week of add drop), do it next semester, and I can still get my tuition fee refund. So, I went online, and the first thing that I saw was..

NEW EMAIL from xxx. CLASS CANCELLATION.

Maybe I should just drop the class, and I do not have to worry about waking up at 9a.m. on Thursdays anymore, for the rest of the semester. Then I thought, maybe, I should keep believing in myself, that I can wake up at 9a.m, and attend all the classes. What other assurance do you need, when He already believed in you?

9a.m every Thursday.

The Minority

2007-09-15T01:21:00.000-04:00

I often think of myself as part of the majority. However, I came to realize that I am actually part of the minority. The minority that does not need to worry about working their way through college, that are able make their dreams come true, that have parents who are loving and supportive of whatever it is that they are doing, that do not need to worry about paying back loans as soon as they graduate, that are fed well, dress well and so on.

For all these, I thank my parents. Without their support, both financially and mentally, I would not have made it so far. So, thank you daddy and mommy.

3 Months Later

2007-09-10T22:48:00.000-04:00

I am still here. I am still waiting. and I am still searching.

It's annoying. It really is. I am on the verge of giving up.

So, please call out to me. anything. anytime.

All I need right now, is to hear your voice.

And, only yours.

The start of fall semester hasn't been exactly smooth. The cold is once again back. I might have to move, for the 3rd time. and my schedule is a mess.

Oh Jolly Girls

2007-06-10T04:02:00.000-04:00

Happy Birthday(s) to....

Mayumi ~ may 15th

*On the day that you were born, the angels got together, and decided to create a dream come true..
So, they sprinkle moondust in your hair of black,
and starlight in your eyes so bronwnish black?..*
I don't even remember how we became best friends, everything seemed to fall in place.
Please stay true to your heart, and be who you are!=)My little angel!=)

Ernnie ~ June 3rd

Dearest Ms. Fabulous/Gorgeous/Ernie..
I promised that I'll be back for your big 21, but..I lied. I'm sowwy. But, you know I love you!=)
Besties will always be besties, no matter how far apart we are. Only time can prove that.
So far, we've been doing very well. From Ozie land to Food Heaven and all the way to Hamburger land!I'm very very proud of us!!teeeheeee..There were times where we went out of touch for a few months, but, nothing can really keep us from bonding again.=)
Keep believing in what you believe, fighting for what you want, and following your dreams.
You will shine, bright, cause you are already!=)

Yenny ~ June 7th

My dearest muimuimui/roomie/personal chef (available only during summer, when her beau is back in japan)..
I hope you had a fabulous time on your 21st Birthday! I am glad that I was part of the birthday bash organization! I am definitely going to miss you when September comes..oh well, we'll still be in the same continent. It is only 6 hours by air.=)
Your future awaits you. The world is out there, waiting for you to conquer. So, got get it!!
Dare to believe, dare to do, and that is Yen. =)

Yollie ~ June 9th
Finally, sai yUnYun turns 21!! My fellow music therapist/ partner in crime in Ozie land!
My 4months stay in Australia would not have been complete without you. I miss you dearly, and wish that I could be there to celebrate your big 21st!
Even though it was just 4 months, but, we have made it last for 2 and a half years, so far. *phew..
One day, we shall meet again as music therapists!*crossing my fingers*
I know we will. =) Never stop the music. Keep it going.

It is not everyday that you meet people that can bring about positive changes in your life, I am turly blessed to have met four.=) Have a fabulous year ahead babes!
*hugz & kisses*

Princess Veronica Turns 21

2007-05-11T12:00:00.000-04:00

When Princess Veronica turns 21, she is going to ...
SAVE THE WORLD!!
just like heroes. Miss Yow here has the power to control the world economics, don't play play..
*phew.

Happy 21st Birthday babe!!
Times in Ridz would have been miserable without your constant sunshine smile, and nerdy routine, including our daily dinner at aunty's or uncle's, and of course, our uh-so-very-interesting conversation in the middle of the night.
I wish I could fly to Melbourne to give you a hug, but,..sial arr..so expensive lar tickets.
Wishing you a happy happy birthday!and may happy days continue to fill up the rest of your life!
*hugz.+ kisses*

*p/s: i'm ashame to say that this is the most decent picture i have of you*

Shopaholic Turns Twenty One

2007-05-09T01:17:00.000-04:00

HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY to...

Shaburockabella

Once upon a time, graceytrainbowlolly met shaburockabella over dim sum during her first semester in Berklee. On their way back from dim sum, they took the “scenic road” a.k.a Newbury Street (shopping district), and found out that they actually share a very dangerous mutual interest, SHOPPING! (apuhden?). As you can see, from the picture, they are also cam-whoring buddies, as well as food, events, art, etc.

As shopaholic turns 21, she is going to… SHOP MORE!
Happy Birthday muimui! =) Have a wonderful day, even though you are probably very stressed out about finals and everything else. May your music hit the big screen soon after you graduate, and be the next John Williams, of course, the trendy version. la.la.la.
*hugz + kisses*

Hanging In There

2007-05-08T21:00:00.000-04:00

*south boston art district*

I never knew how it felt being lonely until I left home.
However, when I saw you, I knew that I was not the only one.
You too,
were struggling to keep yourself from swaying when the wind blows,
grasping on firmly to the wire,
just so that you won’t fall,
and fail to shine as you were suppose to, in the dark.
Every second is a constant struggle for survival.
Yet, you strive to hang in there.
Therefore, so should I.

Life and Death

2007-04-18T17:33:00.000-04:00

Monday, April 16th, 2007, another black day in American History. 33 lives, all it took was one man, one thought, to take away 33 lives, including that of his own.

Today, the Virginia Tech news is no longer the top story. For today, up to 200 people had been killed in Baghdad.

Here I am, breathing. This is life.

There they are, 5807 miles away, lying in deep silence. Reason unknown.

My heart aches.

2007-04-16T23:54:00.000-04:00

*someday, i'll get there. Not now, not never, but someday*

The strong wind blew away the clouds. Once again, the sun is shining.
The fairy tale weekend is over, it is time to get back on my own feet.
I know I'll get there, not now.
Not sometime soon.
But it will never be never.

April Showers

2007-04-15T15:55:00.000-04:00

There is no black and white, but simply grey.
Even the strongest ray could not penetrate through those heavily loaded clouds.
Flip-flop is neither flipping nor flopping. It is in it's stationary mode.

Words: B.G.DeSylva Music: Louis Silvers

Through April shwoers may come our way,
They bring the flowers that bloom in May.
So if it's raining,
have no regrets,
Becuas it isn't raining rain you know,
It's raining violets,
And where you see clouds up on the hills,
You soon will see crowds of daffodils,
So keep on looking for a blue bird,
And listening for his song,
Whenever April showers come a long.

I shall learn this for Wednesday practicum.

Looking on the bright side, at least it is raining for a reason.=)

Need time to think?

2007-04-12T22:06:00.000-04:00

*to my dearest marmar aka ms. durian Lin, the blog is not dead, I just need time to think.*

Think....

Still thinking lar..=/

What happens when...

2007-03-18T00:50:00.000-04:00

...you fall?

Yes, I fell hard on my arse right across from Little Italy. For the entire day, I was walking safely in puddles, on snow etc..but NOT ON ICE. arrrggggghhhh...So happen today is St. Patrick day, everyone was drunk, so, people falling down on ice, is actually quite common..but, the thing is, I did not even have a single drop of alcohol in my system!arrrrggghhhh..

...you fall, and the people with you are musicians?
In my case, I was out with Lionel and Livia, both musicians.
Lionel who was walking ahead with Livia turn over and said:
WOw, that was pretty LOUD!
Livia: ah..your mike's pastry!

The only non-musician in the group, Ms. HanBoonLi (biotech major in Buffalo):
Are you OKAY?
*Burst out laughing after that*

Pretty much, the whole scene was filled with laughter. No, i did not cry even though it hurt like hell. A fall per icy season, unavoidable!!!

When the eye meets bostonians

2007-03-09T19:08:00.000-05:00

I have finally acquire the layering photoshopping skills!*beam with joy*

Fear

2007-03-08T21:17:00.000-05:00

This week, our special education class focuses on the DEAF. Deaf with a capital D refers to a culture who have a certain level of hearing loss and uses signing. I’m afraid of losing my hearing some day. Yesterday, while I was surfing the internet, this tone kept ringing in my ears. At that moment, I know, some of my ear hair cells just died. I know it happens all the time. However, yesterday was the longest ring that I have ever experienced. I fear for being a part of the culture someday. I am such a hypocrite. Here I am telling how much I respect the Deaf, and back to reality, I am actually afraid of being a part of them.

Tonight, I went for a fund-raising concert for this group of music therapist students who will be going to Africa in the summer to do music with the orphans. As I was watching the video of previous tours, my heart cries out for all these kids abandoned by their parents. I want to be there for them, to do music with them. On the other hand, am I capable? I am so sheltered.

I thought I was cool with the transvestite population, reality check, I am not. The other day, when I went to pick up my boots, I met one. I can’t stop looking at him/her. Checking out what he/she was wearing, what kind of shoes, the hair, the body, the voice.. The feeling was really weird. I thought I would just walk pass one without saying or feeling anything, but every time I do meet one, I can’t stop looking, or talking about it. I feel really awful.

I am afraid that believes that I thought I believe is not my true believes.

Under these Umbrellas

2007-03-02T19:39:00.000-05:00

It is Friday, March the 2nd, 2007.
Weather: Gloomy
It has been pouring continuously for the entire day,
and I have been walking from one place to another under my black umbrella.
I used to have a cute polka dot umbrella,
But it broke because the wind was too strong, that it could no longer stand.
With the umbrella above me, rather, covering me, I could not really see any faces, just the lower part of bodies.
When I finally got closer, I took a glance of the stranger’s face,
And then continue on with my journey.
I wonder who will be the next person that I will meet,
Under these umbrellas.

The NewYear of the Chinese goes..

2007-02-24T02:28:00.000-05:00

Destination No. 1 --> NewYork NewYork

After a long night out on Friday, early saturday morning, Shaburockabella a.k.a Ms. Isabel Lam and I took the 8a.m *LuckyStar* (cheapest transportation to NYC), to New York. Mind you, it was a four hour ride to. We came back on the same day. Which adds up to 8 hours in total! *phew..8 hours just for the sake of *YeeSang*, cause we could not find it in Boston, and also some shopping, including groceries shopping, yes, all the way to NYC, and of course, real shopping! Spring Street, Mercer Street where Marni is, Soho..etc. Each time we come, we discover some new unique shops. *Thumbs up!
At the end of the day, we got what we need for CNY, and even found Malaysia Beef Jerky a.k.a *yook gon*!!!Back to the bus, and back to Boston. A very purposeful day trip!=)

Destination No. 2 --> DimSum @ China Pear. 1st day of CNY.

The festive red crew on the left, and the rest on the right.
On the first day of CNY, part of the MAS crew had DimSum. It was our dear aunty Lisa's birthday too!! The woman in a black top with a red scarf who does not act like her age, yes, that is our dearest aunty Lisa, the wonderful harpist!*love you long time* quote from Steph. At night, we had a little gamble session at my place with tea and cookies all the way from home. *sweetness*.

Destination No. 3 --> Reunion Dinner @ Penang. 2nd day of CNY.

Happy Chinese New Year.

After the meal, the *YeeSang*, all the way from NYC fulfilled it's purpose.
Aunty Lisa had two cakes for her birthday.
Everyone was in a jolly good mood.=)

On a sadder note, next year's reunion dinner, we will probably have only half of the crew left, because most of the crew members are graduating at the end of this spring semester or the coming fall semester. *sob..
Oh well oh well, at least we had a great time this year!=)

Now that I remember, about a month ago, over pastas and wine, I had a rather interesting conversation with Ryu. The conversation went...
Ryu: Hey what year is it in the Lunar calender?
Me: hmm..Pig, i think.
Ryu: yeah..the pig with the two horns?
Me: hmmm..oh..horny pig?
*laughter from everyone*
Me: what so funny?
Ryu: ...you just said Horny pig.

*cold. Okay. End of post!=)
T

2007-02-18T19:22:00.000-05:00

Maybe there's no right time, right moment,
you just have to follow what your heart says.
*sex & the city season 4, Just say Yes*
Total randomness.

I've just spent the entire 1st afternoon of CNY 2007 cleaning up my apartment, and watching S&C season 4. And no, i did not sweep anything out of my apartment, because my apartment is fully carpeted. yeap, so all my luck is still in my vacuum cleaner!*cold*
Out soon for dinner, and then...
La MahJOng and Poker party at mua Place!!

Gong Hei Fatt Choi to everyone!!=D Pictures are on their way!!

2007-02-15T18:31:00.000-05:00

I am currently..
Speechless. Losing words to express my feelings.
Lost in my own world.
Unaware of other beings.

I'm a heartless creature.

International Crew

2007-02-11T01:38:00.000-05:00

Crew Memebers: Ryu (Japan), Mathias (Norway), Annette "girl in red"(Norway), Hanna (Germany), Me.
Activity: makan. Explore Boston.
Location: The street behind Beacon Hill.

Tonight, I was introduced to this whole new area in Boston. I cannot believe that after a year living in Boston, I had never step foot onto this street filled with nice restaurant, little shops, and some art galleries. baaah..tsktsk.
To the Malaysian crew, lets go makan makan soOn!!

原諒

2007-02-05T21:17:00.000-05:00

聖經上說，原諒你的敵人７０個７次。
那，７０個７次後又如何呢？
還要原諒嗎？應該嗎？
我不知道，真的不知道。

Missing baggage

2007-01-30T22:29:00.000-05:00

I have been back for more than a week now, and one of my baggage is still missing. =(
I want it back, badly. Please send it back to me.

A Good Year

2007-01-22T19:32:00.000-05:00

Finally, we have our first snow of the season. Not too heavy, just enough to add a new color to Boston city. Snow flakes floating in the air...hmmm..I am alive again.=)

A fresh start to the new semester. It is going to be a good year.

2006-12-11T04:59:00.000-05:00

Today, I broke the ms.i-don't-do-rice title and had one bowl of rice.
Last night, I had nightmares Julie cutting me off half way through my presentation.
Time is running out, yet, I'm not doing anything productive, really.
The weekend is over. It is officially Monday, 5.08am.
In three hours time, I have to get myself ready and out to the battlefield.
Part of me desperately want this week to end as soon as possible.
Yet, part of me don't.
baaahhh...
I need a rollercoaster ride.

2006-12-08T03:36:00.000-05:00

Someone once told me that it feels good to cry.
So I tried.
And, he wasn’t lying, cause it actually felt pretty damn good.

2046

2006-12-03T02:12:00.000-05:00

在那里，只有恛憶，美儷的恛憶。
到過那里的人，都回不來了。
不是因為旅途太遙遠，只是現時太殘酷。
而，
美儷的恛憶，就永遠那麼的美好。

Memories are such powerful elements life.
We are who we are today because of what we have been through.
The bitter ones, the sweet ones, both, we carry with us throughout our life time.
No rewind, no pause, only play.
Tonight is one those nights,
I take a walk down memory lane.

*note: The snow is on it's way. Friends, stay warm.*

Growing up

2006-11-29T06:10:00.000-05:00

I can no longer wander aimlessly..
When was the last time I walked barefooted on a green pasture?
When was the last time I rode a bike?
When was the last time I...
I don't remember..
Now, every minute counts,
It adds up to the "future".

Sometimes, I really miss being that little girl in the big big world.

Are you there?

2006-11-28T00:36:00.000-05:00

I...Wonder...wonder..and....wonder..

Views

2006-11-26T22:30:00.000-05:00

...from where I used to live.

I miss walking on the scenic path on a daily basis.
I never knew how lucky I was till I moved out.
The unevent sidewalks, the decorative christmas lighting, and how beautifully the red leaves hang against the red brick wall...
I always say to myself while I was still a newbury street resident that I would take a picture of that.
When I finally brought my camera out, the leaves were all gone.
Some time around October this year, I finally took a picture of it.

...from where I live now.

No more unevent sidewalks,
Instead of being surrounded by no more than four stories high townhouses,
I'm now being surrounded by sky scrappers, and a view facing the humongous christian science park from my apartment.

I still miss living on Newbury Street.
But, I guess I'm getting use to the new one.
Clinging on to the past is always easier than facing the future, or even living the present.

Grow up child.

&..

some random cheki moments.

*Ask me what I want for christmas, and I would say --> tonnes and tonees of fujifilm instax mini! for my cheki*

Yay to the Parents & Kids

2006-11-22T05:08:00.000-05:00

*Picture found on postsecret.com*

November 16th, 2006. Thursday.
Location: Carter School ( music therapy observation site)

Just like every other thursday of the semester, I went for my practicum at Carter school, where I would observe and assist the music therapist in a one hour session with four children. Today was a little different. It was the thanksgiving lunch with the parents. Some parents were really cheery and chatty. Some just looked tired, and came just for the sake of coming..
Whatever it is, I am thankful for their never ending love for their children.

Looking at this picture, I'm thankful that this was not the last picture taken of you.
I know life is not easy, it has never been easy for you, since the day that you were born,
but thank you, thank you,
thank you for just being there.
I hope someday, my music will bring a smile to your face. *I hope it already has*

*on that day, C picked up the beanbag from the back of her neck and placed it on the tray!go girl!=)*

Blahbahbehbohboooo..

2006-11-22T03:24:00.000-05:00

After missing in action for about a week, I'm back. No more rain, the sun is back, but the weather is getting colder.
The weather last week was gloomy, and I was moody. On sunday night, mom called and told me that the Europe trip itinerary has been confirmed, and so, I should start booking my tickets, and letting my lecturers know that I will be leaving a week before finals. Therefore, on the night itself, I emailed all my lecturers, letting them know that I will be leaving a week earlier. Most of them replied the following day with a positive answer! Me like positivity!*gRingrin*..except for my MTH for special education lecturer. Her answer was a NO!owww..and there goes my week, down the drain.
I kept praying that she will change her mind. And finally, monday morning came, this time, the sun shinning brightly, and I was early for class (how so very rare) = good sign!
After class, I approached my lecturer again, and this time, she told me that the chair of the music therapy department talked to her about my situation, but they still haven't arrive on a solution yet, and told me to email her later in the week.
I am definitely feeling some positive feedback here!yay~!
*pHew

The long weekend, Thanksgiving break is finally here!yAy~ What a relief.

Plans for the short break.
1. pre-Thanksgiving dinner at Ryu's place on Wednesday night.
2. Thanksgiving dinner party on Thursdayat my place with friends, and a special guest --> the uh-so-famous-Ms.-buffalo, Han!!=)
3. Midnight shopping on Black Friday at Wrentham, the one and only outlet mall around the Boston area.
4. More shopping in boston during the day, perhaps.
5. Catching up on movies.
6. Going for a show (maybe) on Saturday night? The Ricecooker band is playing in the Irish Pub at 10pm~! Cover, $5!
7. DimSum, anyone? food.food.food.
8. Karaoke??/eeee...i've been longing for this for quite some time.
9. yack.yack.yack.
10. study, on sunday!

When Monday comes, back to school. I hope that my MTH for special Ed class lecturer will confirm with me her final decision, letting me off earlier. *I will,..I will...okay, fine, I will kiss her feet if she granted my wish!*I have been sitting in front of my baby apple for more than 3 hours now, trying to book myself tickets for winter break. It is the time of the year for some travelling, I would say approximately 80 hours or more on the plane! Oh...but, it is all worth it! Europe + Home, here I come!!
Before that, projects, papers, and presentation!

Oh, how I love college life.=D

Wide awake

2006-11-11T08:15:00.000-05:00

1a.m - intoxicated. Floating in la.la.land.

4.25a.m - lying on the bed, spaced out.

5.45a.m - Chocolate chip chocolate ice-cream with corn flakes & internet.

8 a.m - blogging

It's a long weekend, and I'm glad that it is here.
I need it, I really do.

Sometimes, I just wish that I'm not wide awake to the point where I could see every single flaw of yours.

Is Home a safe place?

2006-10-29T00:13:00.000-04:00

**A friend of my friend has been missing for a few days. Her car was found abandoned at the car park of the shopping mall that she last visited when she went home for semester break. The police and family suspect that she has been kidnapped.
I can only hope that the parents will be able to find the answer that they want, soon. **

Clueless.

It finally strikes me that “this” could possibly happen to my love ones, to everyone.

What is happening? What has my solitude, the place where I call home became?
Is home still a safe place? Or, rather, is this world a safe place?

Perhaps I was too naïve, and over sheltered to be able to notice the ugliness of home, of the world.

Autumn In The Commons

2006-10-23T01:01:00.000-04:00

It's the time of the year when the trees shed off the green, and put on the fall coat. The sun is finally out after 2 days of rain, blue blue sky, a mixture of red and yellow leaves lying on the green pasture of the Boston Commons, laughter is in the air. After nearly 2 hours of trying out different poses, different locations, this is what we came up with. *note: part of what we came out with*.
I love autumn.
I love the sun shinning down on me when it's only 12˚c out there.
I love I love I love....
I'm so in love..with no one, but with everyone & everything!

Nice one=)

Actually, this is more like how we are=D

Bel a.k.a yuko ono

Later today, we had homemade *pan mee*, fried wonton, and spring roll at Belanie's! ( Bel & Mel's place). Thanks to mama Mel and Aunty Chai=)

Missing Items=/

2006-10-21T01:36:00.000-04:00

Can you tell the difference? hmmm..Not really. It's grace.grace.and hmm..grace? putting on a little here and there, perhaps?
Nish: I know i know, it's grace and her big face and her big head. *This is what I think Nish willl say if she ever have a chance to. I'm not making this up, I have concrete evidence, *blink*, but...I'llsave it for future usage!!muahahahah..*

So, yes, I can't live without that particular jacket, that one skirt and that one cardi. I just HAVE TO have them!

L-R: Brown jacket from Mexx.Rugby skirt.Miss Sixty Cardi.

Can someone puh-puh-lease tell me the exact location of these items?! I have been searching high and low for them, but they're nowhere to be seen. I knew something was missing from my wardrobe. As I was looking back at all the pictures, I begin to notice what have I missed. And now that I've noticed this missing items, it bothers me a lot. I mean A LOT. It is rather frustrating!

*crossing my fingers*. I could only hope that they are safe and sound, sitting quietly at HOME, untouched, waiting for me to come claim them at the end of this year.

You'll never know what you're missing out if you fail to notice. You'll never notice if it wasn't because of digital camera.baaaah.. *banging head against wall*.

You'll never appreciate if you've never lost.

Maybe someday, we'll meet again.

[Excuse my randomness, it's rather gloomy and cold out there. and..I simply just miss them.]

I went from...

2006-10-16T01:11:00.000-04:00

* summer school to the land of the rising sun*

Words cannot express my feeling for the land of the rising sun, but I believe pictures can. so.. Click ME

* being a child, to a grown-up *

* having no one, to having them, my family in boston * *love*

Make sure you turn your volume down!!!!!

the so out-of-tune yet sweet burfday song!*gRingrin*

This is what we do at weeEeee hours=)

It's not about me, but YOU, for once.

2006-10-16T01:10:00.000-04:00

I don't know how you feel,
unless you show me,
but you couldn't.

I don't know what to do,
unless you tell me,
but you couldn't.

Every week,
I sit there, observe, question,
and finally...

I realize that it doesn't matter if I know,
as long as you're happy.=)

September 11

2006-09-11T22:01:00.000-04:00

Six years ago, I walked into my parents’ room just to find out that you’ve left us, then, and forever. Puzzled, I stood there, waiting for the reality to finally set in. I did not expect everything to end so soon, so quickly. I have so much to tell you, but I could no longer do it anymore, for you are now gone, forever and ever.

A year later, united 93 got hijacked and crashed into the word trade centre on the other side of the world. The 911 incident, the new black day in American history. Yet, in a small town on the other side of the world, you were still the centre of gravity.

In year 2000, you found peace, and were carried away to a better place, where there would be no pain, no tears, just laughter, and joy.
In year 2001, hundreds of lives were sacrificed for nothing, nothing but war in return.

Six year later, September 11, 2006, today, I walked out from my apartment, breathing in the fresh autumn air, I charged towards my first class of the semester. As professor Codding was reading the class a poem, I close my eyes and you came into my mind. You, and everything of you….

You have taught me that life is short, and is definitely worth fighting for.
I’ve learnt my lesson, but you will never be back.
I wish you would, but it is selfish of me to even think about it.

Once again, you’ve reminded me to fully embrace every bits of life. Doing my life, being my life, and most of all, loving my life. Thank you. =)

State of Mind

2006-09-07T00:23:00.000-04:00

Tangled

Untangle

Enough Said

A test is merely a test.

2006-08-18T02:49:00.000-04:00

Your Five Factor Personality Profile

Extroversion:

You have medium extroversion.
You're not the life of the party, but you do show up for the party.
Sometimes you are full of energy and open to new social experiences.
But you also need to hibernate and enjoy your "down time."

Conscientiousness:

You have medium conscientiousness.
You're generally good at balancing work and play.
When you need to buckle down, you can usually get tasks done.
But you've been known to goof off when you know you can get away with it.

Agreeableness:

You have medium agreeableness.
You're generally a friendly and trusting person.
But you also have a healthy dose of cynicism.
You get along well with others, as long as they play fair.

Neuroticism:

You have medium neuroticism.
You're generally cool and collected, but sometimes you do panic.
Little worries or problems can consume you, draining your energy.
Your life is pretty smooth, but there's a few emotional bumps you'd like to get rid of.

Openness to experience:

Your openness to new experiences is high.
In life, you tend to be an early adopter of all new things and ideas.
You'll try almost anything interesting, and you're constantly pushing your own limits.
A great connoisseir of art and beauty, you can find the positive side of almost anything.

The Five Factor Personality Test

2006-08-16T16:45:00.000-04:00

讓時間沖淡一切，從新開始。

Bring me back to life

2006-08-16T02:01:00.000-04:00

*A sunny day in Boston during one of the gloomy October days, 2005. *

I jumped. I laughed. I was fresh and young.
10 months has passed, I no longer see myself neither making the same face, nor jumping up high in the air.
So much had happened over my less than a year's stay in Boston, I witnessed the changes in weather, from days when the sun is out, and people with happy faces, to days when the city is covered with snow, so quiet, at times, there isn't a single soul on the street.
I need a break, a break from the glaring hot sun, the cause of my heartache. Give me some snow to cool the burnt-out heart. Bring me back to fall. To who I was.

2006-08-14T01:26:00.000-04:00

Eight months had passed since you have been gone. A conversation with Hanna about rosy cheeks has brought into my mind the lovely face of yours. My fair complexion, my rosy cheeks, I inherited it all from you.

Back to my apartment, looking through iPhotos, I searched high and low in my photo album, but not a single picture of you and me. I could only remember you from my memory.

You have taught me so much since day one. Today, you once again reminded me that I should cherish those who love me, and whom I love.

The next trip home, I am bringing back to Boston the last photo we took together last august.

*I miss you popo*

2006-08-13T11:30:00.000-04:00

I do not know what to think anymore. Therefore, I have decided to stop killing my brain cells for this foolish game. A random encounter, misled me into a dream that I thought might come true. 3 months had passed, I have tried all that I could, but you, the one who had given me hope, had let me down numerous times. That's it. I'm calling it off. So long, farewell my dream, I'm taking off, and saying bUh-bye!

Graceyt's Johari Window

2006-08-10T20:12:00.000-04:00

Arena

(known to self and others)

kind, religious, self-conscious

Blind Spot

(known only to others)

accepting, calm, caring, cheerful, confident, energetic, friendly, happy, helpful, idealistic, intelligent, loving, mature, relaxed, sensible, silly, trustworthy, warm, witty

Façade

(known only to self)

adaptable, spontaneous

Unknown

(known to nobody)

able, bold, brave, clever, complex, dependable, dignified, extroverted, giving, independent, ingenious, introverted, knowledgeable, logical, modest, nervous, observant, organised, patient, powerful, proud, quiet, reflective, responsive, searching, self-assertive, sentimental, shy, sympathetic, tense, wise

Dominant Traits

66% of people think that graceyt is cheerful
77% of people think that graceyt is friendly
66% of people think that graceyt is happy

All Percentages

able (0%) accepting (11%) adaptable (0%) bold (0%) brave (0%) calm (11%) caring (11%) cheerful (66%) clever (0%) complex (0%) confident (22%) dependable (0%) dignified (0%) energetic (22%) extroverted (0%) friendly (77%) giving (0%) happy (66%) helpful (11%) idealistic (11%) independent (0%) ingenious (0%) intelligent (11%) introverted (0%) kind (33%) knowledgeable (0%) logical (0%) loving (11%) mature (11%) modest (0%) nervous (0%) observant (0%) organised (0%) patient (0%) powerful (0%) proud (0%) quiet (0%) reflective (0%) relaxed (22%) religious (33%) responsive (0%) searching (0%) self-assertive (0%) self-conscious (11%) sensible (11%) sentimental (0%) shy (0%) silly (33%) spontaneous (0%) sympathetic (0%) tense (0%) trustworthy (22%) warm (22%) wise (0%) witty (22%)

Created by the Interactive Johari Window on 11.8.2006, using data from 9 respondents.
You can make your own Johari Window, or view graceyt's full data.

Routine

2006-08-09T22:46:00.000-04:00

Ironically, I miss taking the one-hour train ride to Quincy College for Western Civilization II.

Since day one itself, I have always dreaded to attend this class. Not only because the time used for traveling, to and fro, takes up to approximately an hour and a half of my precious time, the teacher himself is so boring, and get drifted off into discussing about other irrelevant issues easily, such as the US politics, law cases, etc, which are interesting, but totally IRRELEVANT to the subject itself, and also because it is just one of those required classes that I have no desire for.

Today, again, it is Wednesday. The only difference is that I do not need to go for this particular class anymore. I feel lost. Taking the train at 5 every Monday and Wednesday has become my routine. I am so used to it already that it felt weird when I no longer follow this routine. Then again, the word, routine, sounds too restrictive, and of course boring. No doubt the Western Civilization at Quincy could be boring at times, most of the time, but the company was great. I met a couple of new friends, explore a new area, made the $1.25 train ride worth while, earned my 3 credits and discover the life saver gummy bears in the grocery store next door. Those gummy bears save the lives of dozing off students in class!

All in a sudden, I have so much free time in my hands. Do not be mistaken, I am not complaining. I am definitely enjoying this empty slot that used to be filled, from 5-10pm, every Monday and Wednesday.

***Of Gummies and Quincy.***

2006-07-30T20:11:00.000-04:00

People, please collect your laundry from the dryer once it is done, in order to make space for others!!

2006-07-29T01:48:00.000-04:00

Weather forecast: ALERT! THUNDER STORM ALL NIGHT LONG!

pOof! Gone within 3 hours.
No rain, not even a single cloud. The sky is clearer than ever.

After 3 hours of continuous pouring, the earth finally gains its' mointure back after a week of heat. Friday nights are always filled with possibilities. For the majority of singles, Fridays nights are "hunting" nights. For the couples, cuddling time?
As for me, I'm just glad that it rained. I'm simply happy and satisfied. hmmm..Well, just so happen, tonight is my kind of night. *sheepishgrin*..

Days

2006-07-27T15:27:00.000-04:00

If I were to choose my favourite day of the week, referring in particular to this semester, it would definitely be Thursdays!
Well, why?
Thursday is the day when I have my favourite general education class, Art History 1, taught taught by another genius in the General Education department in Berklee.
Secondly, it is also the only class I have for the day. After 1pm, I'm a freeman! I could either choose to take a nap, hanging out and do nothing, catch up on my readings, or perhaps, on the more productive side, do some house chores?..
Oh..How I just love Thursdays.

On the other hand, Tuesdays, with Traditional Harmony and Counterpoint, plus, working for 4 hours in the Media Centre..the worst day! Don't even bother talking about it..

Monday?..not my best day either, all because of the Western Civilization in Quincy, otherwise...

Both Wednesdays and Fridays can sometimes be fun. Harmony class with Mr. Kress is always fun, then, after lunch, enter the hypnotizing ear training class! The only ear training class that I have taken so far that has a hypnotizing effect, I wonder how is that possible.

Then come the weekends, starting out at 7pm on Fridays, which runs through Saturdays and finally ends on Sundays evenings, which for the most part of this summer, has been tiring. Going out in the day and night, not getting enough sleep...but good times.

I miss those days when I can be not productive and yet not feel guilty about it --> HOLIDAYS!

2006-07-26T02:43:00.000-04:00

She's leaving in less than a day's time. Leaving Berklee, and not coming back. I won't see her in fall 2006, neither am I going to see her in all other coming fall semesters. It saddens me when someone who's so passionate about music, about singing has to leave because of unavoidable circumstances. Any how, wishing you all the best in which ever direction you desire, catching your dreams, Kayoko-chan!and maybe, I'll move to Tokyo after I graduate huh~lolz.

Kayoko & Grace..final shots.

Summery Boston

2006-07-23T01:58:00.001-04:00

Two months ago, someday in mid-May, I was on holidays. Right now, I'm in the midst of the final stage of summer semester. With final projects knocking on my door, exams, taking the train to Quincy college just to get 3 credits, and working in the two *most happening* places in Berklee, the library and media center. I can no longer wait for this pain to be over, to be on a flight again, maybe meeting a stranger somewhere on the street in Japan?..*dream on*...

and..

I am aware at the fact that I complain all the time, which is really bad. I mean, wars are happening all over the world, disastrous events happen everyday, I should be thankful that I'm still alive, yet I'm always complaining. Why oh why? I try not to. Is it because I'm simply a human being? or because I just don't love enough? Am I just not a forgiving person, and is that why I'm always complaining? arrgggh...

I guess I'm just frustrated for not being able to help. or maybe, I'm just simply complainig.

Oh well oh well...Looking at the bright side.

Outtings on weekends, a stroll down newbury street, all the way to boston common, catching up on movies, music and books, enjoying an icy cool starbucks coffee, going to the gym when I'm in the mood to sweat, trying out new restaurants...and patiently waiting.
*One of my favourite qoute: Patience is a virtue. ~ Missy Ernie.* I only learn from the best. lOlz.
Boston, after all, is still beautiful, despite the heatwave and rain, that hit once in a while.

p/s: I'm ok.=)

Gaps

2006-07-06T01:30:00.000-04:00

My world has been upside down. I’m trying so hard to fill in those miscellaneous gaps, but I just can’t. They are not only unfilled, but somehow, seem to grow larger each day. I have no idea how can I fill those gaps.
Sometimes, you think you know someone, the next minute, you realize you don’t anymore. I guess people change, for better or worse. It just breaks my heart to witness all these changes, all, in less than a month.
I want to fill in those gaps, but somehow, a stronger force, will power, is not allowing me to. I still love who you were, but not who you are, at least, not now.
For now, I’m glad that I know, despite all these changes, one thing will never ever change, and that is God’s love. And all these little bumps along the road has definitely brought me closer to God and closer to those that I did not see in the past.

2006-06-26T00:36:00.000-04:00

Sometimes, reality can cause so much pain, yet, it wakes you up, and releases you from living in denial. I'm just glad that I'm finally waken from my dream. At the same time, I'm heartbroken. I guess it will heal over time. But right now, I must first learn to forgive. Eventually, everything might settles down, back to how it used to be, but it will never be the same.

2006-06-24T03:50:00.000-04:00

Waken by the one call from someone I love so much, a call that woke me up not from my sleep, but from the dream, the dream that I have been happily living in for the most part of my life. Why does reality always have to be cruel? The truth is heartbreaking. The pain is unbearable, but I guess, all these while I knew it about it. Subconsciously, I was prepared. God has prepared me well to handle this situation. I have never fallen from such high ground before, and my heart is bleeding. Will it ever stop?

New York City

2006-06-20T00:31:00.000-04:00

This is the third time that I'm visiting NYC in less than a year's time. I used to long to visit NewYork, but I didn't have a chance to till last October. Here I am, in Boston, only four hours away on the bus, all the way, cruising on the freeway, to the big apple.
Shops which open till midnight, 24/7 restaurants, broadway, brightly lit 42nd street, yellow cabs, ever posh 5th ave., phunkychic soho, good and reasonable food. New York City, a true living city.
I don't think I can live in New York City, but I definitely love the city for it's liveliness. With the company of Bel, Steph, Mel, Liv, & Lionel, this trip was definitely a great one. All the kodak moment, food hunting, subway taking, map reading, shopping, stuffing tissues into our ears in order to prevent the cockroaches from invading our bodies (yes, the hotel was really bad),but...
I still love NYC. and..I'll be back!
*for pics, click on the title!Enjoy=)*

Maybe

2006-06-09T11:11:00.000-04:00

Just maybe...

I should not have enrolled in summer course.

Reasons:
I miss home already! My family, friends, food..arrrggghhh...
Gloomy weather. Broken hearts. The atmosphere is rather depressing.

Solution:
Bear with it.

My Summer Vacation

2006-05-31T09:59:00.000-04:00

Home “home” lies on the equator. A country truly blessed by God. Not only do we have beautiful breathtaking beaches along with delicious food at reasonable prices, we also have the most beautiful people on earth, dy “dee” and my “mee/mi”(my loving parents whom I can always count on), brothers *drew, ron & bi* (my biological slaves, and entertainers), and of course friends who constantly forgive me for not keeping in touch.
It’s amazing how people reconnect even after they haven’t seen each other or have a conversation for a very long time. This is how I feel every time I’m home. It only takes one “mamak” outing or a phone call to reconnect, to know what’s happening in each other’s lives.

Thanks to a visit from Mayumi, I got to spend 3 days living in an island, total relaxation. Waking up to the strong ray and the sound of the seawater smashing itself so hardly against the rocks, lying under the hot sun on the white sandy beach, swimming in the crystal clear swimming pool look alike sea, felt blotted from food, and the most unforgettable diving experience. It was on this trip that I was exposed to one of the most wonderful creation of God, the underwater world. Followed by the 3 days 2 nights relaxation island package was the eat-all-you-can at Penang Island, the home of Yen. Walking in the hot and humid weather just to locate the most famous “cendol” stand, stuffing food down our throat simply because we are human beings which made us irresistible to temptation, talk till we fell asleep, and just laze around the house, doing nothing.

Second home --- Melbourne, city of indulgence. A warm welcome into the home of the Chan’s *Erica & Kylie* (offering me the kindest of all hospitality and ultimate companion for 5 days), catching up with pals from Melbourne University and old time buddies, bringing myself back to the heart of worship, indulging myself in chocolate fondue served with strawberries from Max Brenner, fresh blueberries cheesecake and skinny latte from café Trevi, smoothie from Boosts Juice, black sesame ice-cream from Koko, cruising in all the hot shopping spots, scouting out for potential goods, reliving Melbourne for a short 5 days.
I felt as though I haven’t left at all, yet so much has happened since the day I set my heart for Boston.

My vacation is coming to an end. It’s time to tune back to being a student in Berklee, setting my traveler’s identity aside, until…I do not know when. Till the 3rd of June, I’m still the daughter and the friend who comes home once in a while seeking for comfort.

Moving On

2006-05-15T21:51:00.000-04:00

Walking down to 262 Newbury Street,
Climbing four flag of stairs to apartment 4B,
With strength, I pushed open the white wooden door,
an opening to a brightly lit living room with yellow painted walls.
The stars that hung from one side of the living room wall was till light up,
Ah…the benefit of electricity being taken care of.

Walking into the orange painted bedroom,
The sunflower from my 20th birthday hung loosely from the window top,
The keyboard box wrapped in Urban Outfitters curtain has now been moved,
There’s nothing left besides the bed, with the dragon curling up the frame.

Final shower in the blue painted bathroom,
Shielded only by a butterfly printed shower curtain with butterfly hooks,
The yellow rug lies on the white wooden floor,
God knows when will be next time I step on it again.
I started blowing dry my hair,
When I was done,
Strands of hair lying on the floor,
Too much consumption of instant noodle I suppose.

Hungry…
I walked into the turquoise painted kitchen,
Pulling out a bottle orange juice from the fridge, and down it.
Full from the fast moving liquid,
I settle down on my bed.

Ran through the luggage that I packed the night before,
Doubled check the bathroom,
Making sure I’ve gotten everything in.

Slowly,
I started moving my two huge suitcases down the stairs,
Oh boy, I’m going to miss those stairs.

One final climb, and that’s it.
I took a final glance around the apartment,
A carry -on on one hand,
And a handbag on the other,
Closing the door,
I made my way down those stairs.

Moving on,
From stairs to elevator,
From brown stone and wooden floor to a high-rise and carpeted floor apartment.
The future sounds promising enough for me to move on,
Clean spacious apartment, with all sorts of facilities, and a wonderful apartment mate
But…

There’s always a “but”,

262 Newbury Street, apartment 4B was my first place, my solitude in Boston,
the place where I call my second home.

Like what Pratt says, “I’m good, but you have to move on, or learn to move on.”

I’m learning…
Trying to remind myself that when I get back to Boston,
The cab driver will be driving me to 150 Huntington Ave., instead of 262 Newbury Street.

At the mean while,
I’m going to enjoy my holidays!

Have a great summer!

Home...

2006-05-02T18:51:00.000-04:00

is where my heart lies.

After a short visit from Chua, I want to go home. I realize how much I misses my family, my friends, and the food!! I can't wait for this horrible dreadful semester to be over! The projects piling up, with piano exam coming up, I'm living on the edge!
Regardless of how bad this coming week is going to be, I had a great weekend! The shopping, the eating out, the talking, it was great! I can't wait to come home, and to visit Melbourne again!!

L-R: Chua, me & Lisa @ dimsum

Mayumi & Me with starbucks...lOlz. at Boston common

Beautiful glasses

Success after several failure attempts!

Health is Everything

2006-04-24T19:36:00.001-04:00

Rain rain go away, come again another day...
Flu flu go away, don't come anytime soon!!!

All the overdoze of fruits, water, tea, honey vitamin C, and not forgetting to mention, medication, I'm finally recovering. Unfortunately, I've spread my sickness to a few friends..arrr..*ooopzz..sorry*.
Been coughing and blowing my nose off for the last few days. Due to overdoing these two activities, and way too hard, I actually found myself gaining some muscles at the abs!

I still haven’t figure out the exact reason that leads to this disastrous sequence of events. I guess my body was just too tired, and decided to give up on me on Wednesday morning. For 5 days, I couldn’t do anything but sleep and eat healthily. Food was tasteless, life was dull, forced to be anti-social and not do any work.

I’m glad that I’m finally recovering, thank God.

*tag-boarders**: thank you peeps!

It feels good to be healthy again!=)

2006-04-24T19:36:00.000-04:00

Weak

2006-04-22T15:08:00.000-04:00

Attacked!

It’s too late to escape.

I’ve been down with flu, cough, sore throat, and fever since Wednesday. Done all I’m capable of in order to recover. Nothing seems to be working. I’ve tried all possible medication, honey, lemon, green tea, and loads of water. Been sleeping as much as possible. But, I don’t feel better. Frustrated. Disappointed. I feel weak. So weak.

Possibilities

2006-04-08T13:50:00.000-04:00

Raindrops keep falling on my head…..
Strolling down Newbury Street on a rainy day, this is the song that keeps my mind from thinking the unthinkable. Such thoughts, maybe, out of the blue, someone will shelter me with an umbrella. Not just any ordinary umbrella, a huge black umbrella. So huge that it shields me from everything else. It will just be umbrella man and me, and of course, the umbrella. Even better, a driver with a familiar face offering me a ride even if it’s just 3 blocks away.

Being a hopeless romantic, I would prefer walking in the rain, rather than sitting in a car.

Rewind.

Still strolling down on Newbury Street, with an umbrella, but one of my own.

The song is still playing in my head. Not song, just this particular phrase, the rest, I would say it’s just the melody, a song without words. Someday, I’ll probably have the urge to search and find out about the rest of the song, but right now, I just don’t.

Keep strolling. Keep browsing. Keeping both eyes and mind open for possibilities. You never know what lies ahead.

Bits of everything

2006-03-31T17:23:00.000-05:00

From pre to post spring. Pictures say them all.

Pre-spring break..Life was stressful, that the picture can't even be rotated. *excuse for not being able to understand my baby apple*

Up next comes spring break ^-^

I'm feeling London. Breathing in the old and new.

Busy.Fun.Excitement.

Leavingg London. Peace and calmness awaiting...which turn out to be not quite the truth.

Post Spring...
Got back from a busy tiring yet rewarding holiday. When I left Boston for London for spring break, I left with a wound, physically and mentally. I was tired. Still exhausted when I got back, but in a happy way.

After a rough week, (interview in order to get into music therapy, and homework catching up with me), I survived! Proudly announcing to the entire world that I've been accepted into the Music Therapy Major!! No more saying, " well, I'm planning on studying music therapy, hopefully I'll be able to get in and so..". Cause I'm in! There's no return!=)

A day after the interview and all the breaking news, I woke up in the strong ray which definitely have a warming effect. I took a deep breath..It's a beautiful day!

Lost and Found

2006-03-14T16:01:00.000-05:00

A post that I typed last year. Found while I was preparing for my music therapy midterm essay. This is how I feel rite now.

**********************
In the mood for HOME

Everything that had happened in the last 2 days seems so unreal. Sitting down here at Logan airport, I’m finally thinking about everything. It was last night that the ground staff at LA Malaysian airline told me that he might not be able to get all 8 of us tickets home. This morning, good news, we made it. We’ll be flying home at 11.30pm. Thank God it’s at 11.30pm, cause clumsy little me missed my flight. It’s my entire fault. I was supposed to fly off from Boston at 3.50pm, but I missed the flight. Thank god they put me on the next flight without any extra charges. I’ll get into LA at 9.20pm, just 2 hours before I fly off home.

This week has been a rough week for me. The longest week, yet shortest. On Monday, I was happily thinking of beautiful Greece, I’ll be in Greece next week, this time. Tuesday, I had my private instruction, and I wasn’t able to memorize my pieces which I have to play by Thursday. Wednesday, the bad news came through….After all these, I thought I wouldn’t be able to make it for the rest of my exams. Surprisingly, I did. I played all right for Thursday piano exam, and am now done with all my exams except for my English paper, which is due before Christmas. Today, I missed my flight, but got on the next flight, and will be able to make it home afterall…

The journey back home seems so long.

My first semester in Berklee had officially ended. I just can’t believe how fast time flies, snap, and yeah, you’re done. I started with not knowing anything about Jazz, not knowing how to improvise, not knowing how to manage my baby apple power book, an incomplete apartment, no snow, no friends…After four months, I somehow survive and am able to be what I wasn’t, not perfectly, but at least, capable. I made friends, built up new friendship, at the same time, keeping the old ones back home. I started a new chapter in my life, and is graciously (living up to my name) sailing through it…

More to come in Spring semester. More snow, earlier classes, new people…rite now, I just want to go home.

A picture says..

2006-03-08T21:37:00.000-05:00

that..
Grace is a poser. So is Nish.
It was a beautiful day, cold..but beautiful. Loads of sunshine.
Boston has nice park...
wut else..
Looked full from dimsum...I guess.

I'm all fine and well. Has been busy and will be more busy in the upcoming 2 weeks! After that, freedom!Spring break in London! But before that, 2 paper. Prepare a piece for interview and mid terms!!!=(..

I WILL SURVIVE!

eRrmm..LIKE?

2006-02-24T15:06:00.000-05:00

I overheard the most "interesting" conversation from lunching at Espresson Royal (my favourite sunrise bagel and hot chocolate cafe in Boston) today. It goes LIKE this..

" I went to the doctor, I was LIKE, well, I DON'T KNOW...The doctor was LIKE..you KNOW..people LIKE us? *erhm..I don't*..It's just LIKE..I was LIKE.." and it goes on and on and on with the word, LIKE. Every single sentence that came out from the woman's mouth contains the word, LIKE.

geEezzz..who speak LIKE that? At the same time, I wonder if I speak LIKE this..or blog LIKE this..

Snow

2006-02-14T15:09:00.000-05:00

Deceived by the word, spring, after the snow storm on sunday. How can it be spring when 3 inches of snow fills the ground? How can a word so beautiful yet so cruel in reality? Where're the flowers? I don't see greens, just brown dead branches, lifeless.

Cold. Wind. Snow.

Such great combination of nature which can only be witnessed in late winter or early spring.

Snow falling from above in such high velocity that all at once it looks like an extremely long thread. Breathtaking. 8 hours later, the earth is filled with snow as thick as 3 inches or more.

Stepping out from the sanctuary for the first time of the day, I could not feel anything except numbness in the air. Everything was so calm and still, as if accepting the brutality and appreciating the beauty of snow. It was cold, and is still cold, will still be cold, for at least 2 more months.

But..

I'm just glad that I'm here. In the snow.

2006-02-03T18:42:00.000-05:00

.....

Chinese New Year's eve turn out to be quite a *rewarding* night after all. 3 hours of great music presented by the Berklee 60th Anniversary concert, what else can you possibly ask for? Especially when Herbie Hancock, Michel Camilo,*great pianist*, Bill Cosby,*entertainer*, Paul Simon,*singer songwriter*, Gloria Estefan,*singer*, Gary Burton, Esperanze Spalding,*berklee grad, awesome base player, i mean, acoustic*, and many more great musicians were performing, including some Berklee students, faculty and alumni!! 2 HOURS of waiting in line just to buy the tickets served it's purpose well. We got the 2nd role from the stage!!! However, I kinda wish we were seated further away, maybe 5th role? Lolz...

Looking at all these musicians performing on stage, my heart was so filled with jealousy, just for a while. I want to be performing too! However, I still need loads of practice before I can be on stage. The second thought that pops into my mind was that, I want to change my principal instrument from keyboard to voice. Look at the number of background singers and the number of pianist that could be on stage. Obviously, if I were a singer, the chances of me being on stage would definitely be higher than being a pianist. Oh well, just a thought. Piano and music therapy is still my passion. The crowd maybe different, but the effect will still be the same. Both are touched by the music.

As for Chinese New Year dinner, we had a shabu-shabu a.k.a steamboat, luk luk at Chinatown, on the first day of CNY. My second shabu-shabu since I arrived at Boston. We had the reunion dinner on the Thursday before Chinese new year, which was, no doubt, yummy. Eating in the company of good friends, with laughter filling the air…once again, brought me back home.

Instructions had begun for 2 weeks now. I can’t believe it’s been 3 weeks since I left home. So far, I’m satisfied with all my classes except for my arranging class, which last for 2 hours, well, thank god, it is only once a week! I wouldn’t really blame the teacher, she’s all nice and helpful, and the amount of work she gave seems reasonable, it’s just the class. I’ve come to a conclusion that I will not be an arranger after attending 2 classes. Moving on from boring class. So far, the most interesting class would be my introduction to international music therapy class. It seems tough, but the teacher is really encouraging, and helpful, music therapy mar…lOlz..She made us sing our name during our first class, so that we will remember each other’s name. Well, this certainly works, for now, I know everyone in my class. A rather challenging class because it requires interaction between people, and of course creativity. In order to be a good therapist, you have to be able to play at least 4 instruments, including piano, guitar, percussion and voice. The passion for music is a must, but the passion to help is also important. After attending the first class, I doubt my ability. However, the second class changed my mind after watching a video concerning music therapy. I was deeply moved. I’m determine to get into the course and graduate within 2 and a half years!

Grace’s latest goals:
1. Get a 90 in the class.
2. Maintain a GPA of at least 3.5 and above, in order to get into and stay in music therapy.
3. Get into music therapy by fall semester.
4. Graduate at summer 2008, preferably spring. We’ll see how it goes.
5. Before achieving the above, practice hard. Learn more leaks, and work harder on voicings and improvisation. At the same time, build my repertoire, and expand my itunes collection.

The following are academically irrelevant, but still goals.

1. Cook as often as possible. Try out more new dish. So far, dishes that I had successfully cook are, spaghetti, and chicken curry!
2. Learn how to bake without magic mix, but hopefully, I’ll get one from London in march!
3. Laundry, laundry, and laundry.
4. Stop watching TV and stop shopping!
5. Churching and serving.

Last but not least, keeping in touch with friends. I’m sorry if I haven’t been a good friend to some of you, but sometimes, I just don’t have the time to. Without internet excess from home, it really sucks. Most of all, blame it all unto me, me, being bound by my laziness!

By the way, I’ll be home slightly later this year, probably around mid august. Well, it is part of my plan to achieve my goals, a.k.a, doing summer course! Yes, after thinking and calculating for almost a week, I’ve decided to make this one little sacrifice for my future career!! After all, I’ll still have about a month break before fall semester! Therefore, I’ll still be home.

I guess I’ve fully recovered from blogaconstipation. Sorry for coming up with such a long-winded post. I just can’t stop my mind and fingers from working…chill out.

2006-01-28T18:45:00.000-05:00

It's amazing how environment changes the meaning of each celebration. Half way round the globe, people are celebrating chinese new year. On the other hand, today just seem to be any ordinary saturday. Maybe not, in the hearts of many foreign chinese students. Back home, chinese new year is one of the festivals that you get to meet all your relatives, eat good food,all the nice biscuits, and angpow. This would be the first year that I'm celebrating chinese new year away from home.*sob*. Of course, the next 4 years or maybe more.

Part of me long for all the good things happening back home. The other part.....

The only and one explanation to that would be my recent visit back home. I'm so used to this place that it actually starts to feels like home to me. I was surprised too. I exchange comfort with freedom. The freedom I have here, which I could never gain from home. A huge consolation for being away from home, the comfort zone both physically and mentally.

....to be continue.....

Then...Now?

2006-01-20T11:05:00.000-05:00

After suffering from *blogaconstipation* for a month, I'm actually, finally posting something. Something....

Leaving without a word was how I ended my first sememster in Berklee, and so was how she left us. Year 2005 was a rather *bumpy* year. From Taylor's to Melbourne, and finally Berklee which is half way through the globe. So much time spent travelling, flying, learning new things, adapting to new environment, making new friends and maintaining the old ones. Despite the many changes, I thank God for guiding me through it all. Many of my friends wonder how on earth did I manage to adapt so well..Seriously, I don't know. I felt like I've been here forever. I had the same feelings while studying in Melbourne. Some how, I felt that all these changes had been drawing me away from God...excuses, excuses and excuses.

Now, a brand new year. I haven't put in much thought about the whole resolution thingi. The first time that came into my mind was to pray, read the bible and serve God. Let Him be my guide. After the death of the love ones, I felt the urge to be more caring towards those whom I love, my family and friends. Also, be a more responsible person.

After typing out this post, I realize I'm still suffering from blogaconstipation.

She

2005-12-15T21:45:00.000-05:00

It was last night that mom called and told me that she went home, forever. I couldn't believe the heartbreaking fact that she left us already. I just had a conversation with her the night before. She told me that she was sick, and that she felt weak, no sign of leaving.....but......

I was holding back so hard, trying to smile as I told my friends. In a way, I assume, to protect myself from being hurt. It was that one hug that broke me down. Tears start rolling down my cheek as I was walking back home at midnight. I cried even harder as I approached my apartment, then stop, thinking that there's no point crying now. Started talking on the phone, keep myself occupied with practice, homework, and work.

At 3a.m, I finally went to bed. The emptiness in the room, the silence haunts me. I felt lost, burst out crying like a child. Trying to think of all the good times we had when I was a little girl. Trying hard to think of the number of times when I actually said, I love you popo, or kiss her on her cheek whenever I leave her house...or telling her about christ. I don't remember...

I wished I had done more than merely going for dinner at the house...I wished I had called her more often...I wished I had told her that I love her so much the last time we talked..most of all, I wished she accepted christ.

It's all too late now, isn't it? ....

She, my beloved grandmother, may she rest in peace. Amen.

I've Got Mail

2005-12-13T23:08:00.000-05:00

After a long day at college, I got home, shower and got ready for work. When I reached the entrace, I saw a green envelope lying on the table. I've got mail.

I was so excited. I'm sure all study abroad students feel my excitement. Anyways, I opened it, *gently*, as I was walking down Newbury St. It was negative 5 degrees celcius outside, but my heart was warm. I nearly burst out of tears when I saw three beautifully written notes and a key chain *which I haven't yet have a good look at it*, from my 3 lovely ex-housemates!
I was carried away from all the stress and the brutal weather for a moment. Thank you girls! You girls made my day!=)

Back at the library, the books were piling up...I have to arrange and put them back. I usually hate this part of the job, but today, I was smiling as I was doing my job.

5 more days and I'll be on my way home.

Good laugh

2005-12-07T05:17:00.000-05:00

I can't wait till after finals to blog this up. It happened while Yenny and I were walking down the stairs from the library, heading home.

Conversation between X and Y.
X: Hey, are you guys watching the Lord of the Ring?
Y: Yeeeeaaah...why? You wanna join? It's really good, highly recomended!(the last part, added by me)
X: har...don't want lar..the japannese movie, THE RING itself is scary enuf..wanna watch LORD OF THE RING summore??..scared lar..

LOLZ!!! I can't stop laughing after she told me that one of her highschool friend actually said that. poor guy!

Will update when finals are done. Blogging at 5.30am..insane! I'm going mad!!

Running, running, running

2005-12-05T15:15:00.000-05:00

Running out of time. Finals are coming up, starting from this thursday, and drag on till the 19th.
Running out of inspiration. 2 music composition+sequencing due on the 12th of Dec and an english paper on the 19th.
Time!! Where are you? I need you!!

Winter is officially here. It was snowing the whole day yesterday. The whole city is white. The road is so slippery, that I have to glide, cause I was wearing some *fancy* boots, which had cause me a pain in the a**. It was a rather graceful fall, suit my name perfectly. It all happen after a long day of walking at the Galleria. Yenny and I were walking towards the T-station. As you can imagine, since it was snowing the whole day, the walkway is kinda covered with snow, which was rather slippery. She was walking normally, strong grip cause she had the right boots on. On the other hand, I have to hold on to her in order to walk safely. Everything was fine till we reach this little slope. OMG..I have no idea what I was doing. I was sliding down the slop, trying to hold on to her arms, so that I won't fall. I was basically struggling not to fall, but she didn't notice but only felt that her arm being drag lower and lower. Finally, when she turned around, she saw me on the floor, burst out laughing. oh boy..and they were two guys behind us. They must be thinking, *when is she gonna fall? Just fall man!!*. It was rather embarassing, but funny.

Enought of stories of falling down. Snowing aint fun. It's cold. Especially when it stops snowing. Boston will be expecting snow on both tuesday and friday.

So much to to this week. Working in the library on tues, wed and sun 8pm-12am, and on thurs, 10-12, then 1-2pm. Practise for private instruction, projects and read Aldoux Huxley's Island, and write a paper. woohoo...So much going on. No matter what it is, Memoir of Geisha and The Lion, the witch, and the wardrobe are definitely in my pack schedule this weekend!!

Thanksgiving B®eak

2005-11-28T18:09:00.000-05:00

Thanksgiving weekend was rather busy, and demanding. Starting with a 6 hours and 30 minutes bus ride to New York on Wednesday. My second trip for the semester. It usually takes only about 4 hours to go from Boston to New York, however, since this is the thanksgiving weekend, traffic was rather heavy. So, instead of a 4 hours journey, it drag on to like 6 hours nearly 7.
Upon arriving, I met up with Sammi, dear cousin from Cornell. We took a cab to the hostel, drop our bags off, and went out for the first meal of the day!! Got back to the hostel with a rosy cheek due to drinking, and slept.

The original plan was to watch the Macy's parade on Thursday morning, which was on Thanksgiving day. However, in order to get the perfect seat to watch the parade, people get in line at 3am in the morning! When was the last time I wake up at 3am?! I'm srue by now my wise reader had figure out that Sammi and I missed the parade! We lied to our parents, so please to keep it low. lOlz.. We got up at 10ish, when the parade is over. The whole day was spent walking and walking..We probably walked like a whole 50 blocks..By the end of the day, I was so tired of walking, can't wait to go back and sleep!!and of course, prepared for the day, Black Friday!

!!!!!Black Friday!!!!! This time, we woke up at 5am in the morning, arrived at Macy at 6am! Never had I been so punctual in my entire life. By 6am, Macy was full of people, and angry looking sales people. After shopping for like 4 hours in Macy, we decided to head off to 5th Ave. All the way till evening, when we finally have our nice dinner at Little Italy. Believe me, it was a very exciting day. I had a long paragraph on black friday, but stupid stupid me accidentally deleted everything!! sighs..

Before I could regain all my energy, I was on my way back to Boston. This time, the journey was rather smooth. I took the 10am bus, and arrived at Boston around 2pm. The scenery along the way was rather sad..snow on the side of the road, *botak trees*, and of course road. I used to think that snow is so beautiful, until I came to Boston. Except for the first snow, I have a feeling that I'll hate snow after this. I can't imagine how harsh winter could be, for I haven't experience it yet..Dragging yourself out from your warm cozy bed, putting on layers and layers of clothings, force yourself out of the door, ready to be tortured by the brutal nature...iekk...

***Back to Boston***
Met up with Yenny and Mayumi at Shaws, got our groceries, and headed back to Yen's to cook. Peepz, I made chicken curry!! We had sushi, spring rolls, chicken curry and 2 chocolate cakes!! The thanksgiving dinner was rather successful, a small party, but loads of fun. Eat, talk and drink!!! fun, fun, fun!! Pics will explain it all...

I wish you love

2005-11-22T15:32:00.000-05:00

I wish you bluebirds in the spring,
to give you heart a song to sing,
and then a kiss but more than this,
I wish you love.

And in july, a lemonade,
to cool you in some leafy glade,
I wish you health and more than wealth,
I wish you love.

My breaking heart and I agree,
that you and I could never be,
so with my best, my very best,
I set you free.

I wish you shelter from the storm,
a cozy fire to keep you warm,
but most of all,
when snow flakes fall,
I wish you love.

-- ost from Prime --

Boston is back to its rainy days again. The cloudy sky..rain drops falling on my head..cold wind blowing at my face..
Walking down Newbury St., I often wonder when is my shelter going to appear...
A broken heart, is hard to mend, especially during the cold cold days of winter. Keep wondering...keep waiting...keep searching...
Now..
This very moment, I decided to stop wondering, stop pondering, stop yearning, stop waiting, stop...
Stop seems such a strong word, rather, give up.

Updates

2005-11-20T15:27:00.000-05:00

First of all, the title wasn't meant to be updates. Again, poor me, with limited vocabulary, ran out with words/ titles.

So far, the week had been productive. I had got some practice done, homework all set, I even worked out for 2 hours? on friday!! The biggest achievement of the week would be cleaning up my apartment on friday night till 5a.m on Saturday! My apartment is spotless now!!wooohoo...My whole body is aching, but I'm so energize. I have no idea what's wrong with me, is that even a good sign? Maybe it is....

Oh well, Saturday was spent walking and shopping at Cambrigde the Galleria with Ieva, Mayumi and Yenny. I bought myself an iPod, my 2005 christmas present! The new 30G ipod video!! It took me a while to finally decide on it. Now I have a collection of apple products. The *apple* of my eye..as Sammi said.

After a long day, we decided to watch a movie. We actually decided to watch Harry Potter, but since Mayumi wasn't there, we decided to watch it other time. Instead of watching Harry Potter, we watched Prime! Which I personally think will be better than Harry...but..I'll definitely watch little Harry this week or so. Anyways, back to Prime. It's been so long since I last watch a movie and cry. The last one was....I don't know...

I'm confused. Sometimes, I wonder if it would be better not to start if it's gonna end. Then again, you wouldn't really know if you don't get it started. Which is worse, to love and let go? or not to love at all. The ironic part about the movie was that, they both love each other, but, why not end up together. Maybe the saying of a relationship doesn't just take love is true. She's 37 and he's 23... a relationship takes responsibilities? what does it take to get started??...

Urgent Prayer Request

2005-11-15T17:40:00.000-05:00

My aunt in Texas was admitted into the hospital with a tumour in her brain...She will be going for an operation next monday. So, please pray for her and her family, may they stay strong and safe throughout!

Holidaying in Texas

2005-11-09T19:02:00.000-05:00

I'm visiting my family in San Antonio, Texas for the long weekend! I never realize how much I missed my parents and my lovely brothers. Yes, I do think that they're lovely. Andrew is much taller than me now, to my surprise, Aaron and Adrian are both catching up too!! gosh..I have a feeling that by next summer, I'll be the shortest in the family!*sigh..*

Andrew, Aaron and I stayed up till 2 last night talking about...hmmpm..their mysterious love life. It was so funny. I can't stop laughing at the fact that how much my brothers have grown physically and mentally. They're now talking about the girls that they're interested in or the girls that are interested in them. geezz..kids now a days..So unbeliveable!! Here goes one of the funny conversation...

Andrew: so aaron, I heard that there's this girl who's interested in you. Who's she?
Aaron: hmm..she's fat and ugly.
*me laughing silently*...
Andrew: How did you find out that she likes you?
Aaron: The girls were doing some paper cutting stuff, and I wasn't in the class. So, the girl suddenly pop up with a phrase, *Aaron is so man*!!
*me laughing hysterically now..*
Andrew: Why did she say that you're man?
Aaron: Cuz I help her with her bandage once..

3 of us started laughing...

I miss not having my baby compaq!! I couldn't get the compose mode in my baby apple!!sigh..I miss windows!!

Pics from New York and Texas up soon!!

Pics from Salem etc...

2005-11-07T14:43:00.000-05:00

I have no idea why blogspot doesn't allow caption!!Irritating!! Oh well, just a short note. Pics that were taken in the dark are pics from Salem. While the one in the day are the ones taken on a sunny day in Boston. THe first pic was taken last wednesday when my family visited me!!!=) Last but not least, a picture of 3 Grace/Graces? @ Gwen Stefani concert!!Enjoy!!

p/s: I'll find a better way to post pictures soon!!

First snow

2005-10-29T15:36:00.000-04:00

************************************It's SNOWING!!!My first snow in Boston!************************************************

For the past one week, everyone that I know has been telling me that it's gonna snow this Saturday. Walking home from Nish and Jess's apartment at 5a.m this morning, at 3 degrees celsius, I was hoping to experience the first snow. Well, of course it did not happen. At this point, some of you might be wondering what was I doing on the street at 5a.m in the morning. Here's the story.

On friday night, I went to Salem with a bunch of friends, this include my beloved fellow malaysians, (Jess, Nish, Lionel and Lisa)! By now, I think I've met most of them! Yay~ Anyways, Salem is about 30 to 40 mins T and train ride from Boston. It is a witchcraft town, with witchcraft museum, haunted house and stuff like that. Most of the people who go to Salem during the Halloween season usually dress up in Halloween costume. Last night, I saw a batman, spiderman, superman, wonderwoman, *chucky*, and some girls dressed up in bunny suites and slutty waitress. I bought myself a pair of huge glasses and a pair of red glittery devil horn!*pics up soon*. My first Halloween!! more like a pre-halloween thingi. Anyways, got back to Boston around 12ish, went to Jess and Nish's apartment and played board games and black jack!ahahah..till 5 am. Yes, bAd baD Bad! No regrets!

Okay, back to snow. Around 1.30pm, Mayumi called and told me that it's snowing! I looked out the window, and yes, it's snowing!!!omg..I went crazy for a while calling everyone on my phone list, well, not everyone, but, yeah, telling them it's snowing!!!muahahaah...can you imagine how excited I'm. Yes, very! While typing this post, it's still snowing outside. I have a feeling that I'll soon grow to hate it, but for now, I'm just as happy as ever. Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow!

Halloween party tonight and Gwen Stefani's concert on Monday!! With mid-term next week. What a week!=D

Falling sick

2005-10-27T17:10:00.000-04:00

Which is worse, to fall sick or sick? I don't know. I'm in the process of falling sick I guess..geezz..this sounds wrong. Falling sick? Anyways, yes, I'm down with flu, sore throat and slight fever, I think. Took a whole bunch of pills last night, didn't really help. So, instead of going to classes, I skipped one of my classes today. Considering I have only two classes today, so, it's kinda bad..but, you know what? I don't care! Cause I'm sick!...and my heater is not co-operating well with me!!!it's freezing!!!

Surrender

2005-10-25T17:16:00.000-04:00

I felt a sudden touch while listening to eagle's wings by Hilsongs. Often, I prayed that may the Lord take charge of my life. Back to reality, I wonder how often I surrender all into Lord's hand. I thought I did, but, thinking back now, I don't think I did. Guilt and shame fills my heart...I pray for a soul that will surrender it all to You, and You only.

Foot massage

2005-10-23T20:01:00.000-04:00

I so need one now! I was standing for like 8 hours on Saturday night, more like, I was paid to stand for 8 hours, or maybe more. Of course, besides standing for hours, I need to put up a smiley face all night long. Stupid me was wearing a pair of flat but pointy shoes! I was so tired by the time I got out from work. I even reach the point of taking off my shoes and start walking, more like running, cause the floor was freezing! And two guys who were still wandering on Newbury,*the street where I live on*, saw me, and ask, "aren't you cold?"! I was like, duh, try doing it and let me know if it's warm! geezZzz..of course it's cold, what do you think?? Besides the long standing hours, the ushering job was actually pretty fun. At least, I've gotto listen to all these really great musician play. Most of them are current students at Berklee, but they sound like a real band man! I want to be able to do that in the near future!

Today, I did a lot of walking too. I'm getting tonnes of muscles on my calf! Massage! Please!!

Grace's first paid job!

2005-10-20T16:45:00.000-04:00

After weeks of pondering upon my computer screen, waiting for a job reply, I've finally got a temporary job!!yay~Yes, Grace got her first job in America, more like her first paid job in her life. I'll be working as a usher in a music festival organized by Berklee and some other organization. It'll start from 3pm and runs till 12 midnight on Saturday!!The best part is I get paid $7.50 per hour just ushering people to their seats!better still!!Yes, so, this is kind of the highlight of the week.

So far, my week has gone pretty well. I had a really busy weekend, and a rather crazy sunday night. I stayed up till 4 in the morning to do my essay! My monday was a rather long and tiring day, filled with classes and more classes. sigh..but, it's all over now!

So far, my week has been rather dull. The most exciting thing that I did was visit the Boston Public Library!I've never seen such a large library in my life!!Filled with books, and bookworms!Apparently they have a whole section where they have books from the 1600!!omg..

In conclusion, I'm assuming that the peak of the week will fall on Saturday, and hopefully, Sunday!*grin*